A typical day

--Get up.
--Make breakfast.
--Eat while checking email and making small talk with kid.
--Kid leaves for school.
--Start article.
--Get distracted and wander off.
--Notice unfinished walls look uglier today than ever before in the entire history of the house
--Haul out bucket of drywall mud, realize it needs thinning.
--Call husband (off on his own adventures) to determine whereabouts of mud-mixing drill attachment
--Find drill (NOT where husband said it was) and attachment.
--Mix mud.
--Remember article.
--Return to computer.
--Continue article.
--Sister calls with ridiculous cute stories about niece.
--Mop kitchen while on phone.
--Finish call.
--Realize mud is drying out.
--Start applying mud.
--Daughter calls from school.
--Cover mud pan with damp rag and wash hands.
--Find daughter's math book.
--Drive to school.
--Deliver math book.
--Come home.
--Realize dogs must be walked before it gets any hotter.
--Walk dogs.
--Come home.
--Need to eat immediately.
--Finish article while eating second breakfast.
--Finish mudding rest of first wall.
--Start second wall.
--Realize I forgot to call dentist.
--Cover mud pan with damp rag and wash hands.
--Call dentist.
--Remember thousands of other vital calls that need to be made.
--Start making other calls.
--Husband asks me to look up prices online for on new diamond mumblety grinder something blades.
--Research mysterious items.
--Get distracted by shiny Internet.
--Remember half-pan of mud.
--Finish mudding.
--Clean up pan and trowel.
--Walk to other house to get paint for fancy new wall.
--Walk back.
--Realize I forgot tint.
--Walk back to other house.
--Notice plants down there look thirsty.
--Water plants.
--Get tint.
--Walk back to regular house.
--Realize I'm starving again.
--Eat lunch.
--Check email.
--Read new assignment.
--Research way too much.
--Start new article.
--Wander off.
--Mix new paint color.
--Return to article.
--Realize dinner needs to get started.
--Start dinner.
--Shower while things are simmering.
--Finish dinner.
--Eat dinner together.
--Ditch husband with dirty dishes
--Have chill movie-watching time with kid while also working on art projects.
--Notice kid has not washed hair in god only knows how long.
--Commence mild lecture about personal hygiene.
--Send kid to shower and bed.
--Continue art project while reducing titles in Netflix instant queue.
--Remember article isn't done yet.
--Find computer.
--Work on article in bedroom till husband arrives.
--Close computer.
--Shovel art crap off bed while he showers.
--Get jammies on.
--Get book out.
--Read approximately three and a half sentences.
--Notice utter exhaustion.
--Turn light off.
--Turn light on.
--Finish article.
--Turn light off.