Reconnection Relativity

This past week brought two friend re-connections: Friend A and Friend B.

The last time I saw Friend A was a year ago or more. I ran into her at the grocery store last week and was happy to catch up for a bit. There’s no excuse for us falling out of touch; we just did. Still, it was nice to see her. She said she’d call me, but I don’t think she will. We don’t call each other. We don’t spend time together. Although we’re fond of each other, neither of us makes any effort to maintain the relationship. Nor does either of us seem to mind the other’s respective apathy about it.

Friend B is an old college friend I last saw about 12 years ago. The day she found me on facebook, I was too hopped up to sleep. (So, of course, Dan was not allowed to sleep either.) This is a girl I have googled countless times, tried to find any scrap of info that could lead me back to her. She now lives a mere two states away (conveniently en route to Minnesota!) and we’ve already made plans to get together this summer.

Friend B was part of my life for less than 2 years, and that was almost 20 years ago now. What on earth connected us so strongly in those few months that the 700 miles between us feels like next door?

And Friend A-- what is it that makes the 12 miles to her place feel like 700?

Connections are a funny thing, the people we choose to maintain relationships with versus the ones who drift away. Or the people you rediscover only to find that friendship was the product of a different time and place and has since dissolved into cobwebs.

Until this week, I didn’t realize that ‘relationship’ and ‘relativity’ share the same root, but I guess it makes sense. They’re both just a matter of perspective.


  1. A feeling I have had so many times, so perfectly put. :) It is corny, I know but sometimes I think about the old girl scout song, 'make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold'. Oddly enough, I feel a stronger connection to my high school friends rather than my college friends...weird.

    xoxo and I sincerely hope that one day you and Dan can make it out to the NW.

  2. We were aiming for this summer actually, Julie, but a boat trip to the Bahamas has arisen and we might aim for that instead. But our good friends are moving to Oregon, so there may yet be a drive thru... If not this summer, for sure next summer!